What Remains?

I have a confession to make.  I’m a negative person. There. It’s out. It’s not my secret anymore.

I don’t know know what events or circumstances in my life have brought me to this point, but negative, sarcastic–and sometimes, even mean thoughts fill my head.

I can’t stop them.  I’ve learned to find gaps in them to ask God for forgiveness.  I turn on my favorite worship music and sing my heart out.  And I’ve learned to keep them to myself.  But, I can’t stop them.

I can’t keep my head busy enough that I can completely ignore them.  There has to be quiet times. During the times when I pray or times when I just sit before the Lord in his presence, I constantly have to reign them in and refocus.  It’s maddening.  It’s chaotic.  It’s defeating.  Almost.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me–put it into practice.  And the God of peace will be with you. Philippians 4:8-9

I’ve come to realize that I may have to battle these negative thoughts for the rest of my life.  Except the Lord heal my mind completely, I will continue to be plagued with untrue, non-noble, unpraiseworthy thoughts.  I may not ever be able to quiet them.  They may always come.  But that doesn’t mean they have to remain.

The One who is in me is greater.  Greater than my thoughts.  Greater than anything that plagues me.  And if I remain in Him, he has promised to remain in me.  Now, that’s the kind of remaining I can deal with.